The Advocate loves Andy Cohen. They don't know anything about his personal life, but they can't get enough of him, even though he says his network isn't gay and that he doesn't want the spotlight. Say what?!
In a cover story that just went up on on their website the gay news magazine fawns all over the Bravo honcho without telling us anything we don't really know. He loves pop culture, he's gay, he's friends with famous people. Whoopie! This is our favorite whooper:
When asked if he'll ever take the stage full-time, Cohen tilts his head in consideration. "I wanted to be on air when I was in college, but right now I love being a TV executive," he says. "All this side stuff is just extracurricular gravy."
Well, if you just want to be an exec, then why not, you know, hire someone to host Watch What Happens Live and all the reunion specials. There are people who do that for a living, and plenty of executives who never get in front of the camera.
Just ask Bravo president Lauren Zalaznick, who you never see and who says something about the channel being so gay, they are beyond gay. Zalaznick says, ""Our audience absolutely has a gay core...But more than that, we know a much bigger circle of our viewers has an enthusiastic, sophisticated, entertainment-based, aspirational view of their own lives, whether they're gay or straight."
Cohen says that Bravo isn't targeting a gay audience and it just "happens to be gay." I hate that phrase. It's kind of like saying that Head and Shoulders is for people who just happen to have dandruff. Cohen also describes his network as "bi" (can you imagine Andy touching a boob? Ha!) because it wants to be gay while attracting a wider audience.
Now we love Bravo and all the Housewives and even, begrudgingly, Cohen, but why does the channel have to have its cake and eat it too. Why can't everyone just say, "Yes, we pander to gays, and to everyone else." There's no shame in it, damn it. That and we want Andy to finally admit that he's as much a famewhore as the bitchy women that his show turns into reality show fixtures. Then we will just lie on the couch for a week watching a Top Chef marathon and be happy.